Working moms are stressed, stretched, and burned out. While juggling meetings, deadlines, and to-do lists, many are also carrying the extra burden of being the “default parent.” They’re the ones handling sick days, dentist appointments, and the daily mental gymnastics of managing a household.
The numbers back it up. According to a new in-depth study by Gallup, nearly half of working women say their jobs have negatively impacted their mental health in the past six months. Even more striking, moms are overwhelmingly expected to handle the unexpected at home, whether it’s a school closure or a surprise science project.
This invisible workload is taking a toll. Here’s how the default parenting dynamic is fueling burnout—and what partners, managers, and companies can do to change it.
The reality of default parenting
The new study from Gallup and Motherly’s Annual State of Motherhood Study reveals that women are still overwhelmingly the go-to parent, no matter how busy their professional lives. Gallup’s research reveals:
- Women take the lead at home. Sixty-six percent of moms say they’re the parent expected to address childcare crises, compared to just 22% of dads.
- Careers take a hit. Moms are twice as likely as dads to turn down promotions, cut back hours, or consider leaving their jobs altogether because of family obligations.
- Burnout is real. Moms who juggle personal and professional responsibilities daily are 81% more likely to experience burnout than those who don’t.
This constant back-and-forth isn’t just exhausting—it’s unsustainable.
Related: Parental burnout: What it is—and what to do about it
What partners can do
Equality starts at home, and partners play a crucial role in easing the load. Here’s how they can help:
- Divide and conquer. Sit down and list all the parenting and household responsibilities. Then split them fairly. (For more support, try the Fair Play method developed by Eve Rodsky.)
- Be proactive. Don’t wait to be asked. Take initiative with tasks like calling the pediatrician or planning the birthday party.
- Provide emotional support. Moms are tired of feeling like they’re shouldering the weight alone. A little encouragement can go a long way.
What managers can do
Managers are often in the best position to make work more manageable for their employees. Here’s what they can do:
- Offer flexibility. Talk to team members about what they need, whether it’s adjusted hours, remote work, or reduced in-office expectations.
- Normalize boundaries. Lead by example and make it acceptable—and encouraged—for employees to log off at a reasonable time.
- Focus on outcomes, not optics. Insisting employees return to the office without a clear and justified reason does more harm than good. Remote work is not just convenient—it’s a lifeline for many working parents.
Related: Report shows for lower-income moms, even feeling burnout is a luxury
What companies can do
Organizations need to create a culture that supports working moms—not just in words but in actions.
- Implement meaningful policies. Flexibility and parental leave must be a standard part of your benefits package. Make remote work the default when possible, rather than forcing employees into unnecessary commutes.
- Train managers to support employees. Only a quarter of workers say their managers provide helpful work-life balance guidance. That needs to change.
- Invest in the default parent. Offer childcare stipends, family leave for both parents, and counseling to help prevent burnout.
Why remote work matters
The return-to-office trend is wreaking havoc on working moms. For many, remote work isn’t just a preference—it’s essential for balancing the constant demands of work and home. Without it, moms face longer commutes, less flexibility, and even greater mental and physical exhaustion.
Research shows that women who are able to work remotely or have a hybrid option are less likely to burn out and more likely to stay engaged in their jobs. Simply put, dragging employees back to the office without a legitimate reason is bad for morale and productivity—and it’s driving moms to the brink.
The bottom line
Supporting working moms isn’t just the right thing to do—it’s good for business. Women who feel they can balance work and home are:
- 50% more likely to thrive in life.
- More than twice as likely to be engaged at work.
- 38% less likely to look for a new job.
Burnout isn’t just a mom problem. It’s a collective problem that requires action from families, workplaces, and society at large. When we support moms—with meaningful policies, flexible work arrangements, and cultural shifts—we all win.
