Maybe some of you have heard some stories about me. Good or bad. Juicy or boring. Scandalous or bleak. Some of those stories were written about me when I was 11 years old. Unfortunately, I’ve seen it all.
I started acting when I was eight years old, my dad would drive me to auditions in California. Some of them were so far away that I would learn the lines on the way there and watch the movie, the sandlot on the drive. I would get there and walk in the room and do an american accent to trick them into hiring me. Now I’m thinking about it, was I an actor or con artist? I usually knew within a few seconds if I got the job and if I didn’t I left them my resume and headshot, so they’d keep me in mind. Growing up in the industry, I felt very aware of the feeling of rejection.
As I was getting older, I started reading a variety of the things people were saying about me and felt that same feeling of rejection, like when I didn’t get an acting job. I felt alone in that feeling, like no one else knew what I was going through. The influence of social media and the press had a negative effect on my mental health and anxiety is still a huge battle I am dealing with today. Luckily with the love and support from my friends, animals, and family, I feel strong enough to censor and protect my world. I do not feel alone anymore.
But with that, I am very aware of other child actors and young people simply living in today’s world with that same feeling of loneliness, rejection, and insecurity. Social Media is detrimental to the minds of my generation and the ones that come after. Mental health is not a taboo topic, it’s a necessary one. Talk to one another. Be kind to one another. Understand and empathize with another. Remember, we are human beings, and we are just being.
For 8 years I wanted to sparkle, flourish, and break out of the boxes everyone tried putting me in. I decided to be quiet when taking interviews and not say anything that could be twisted, because I was scared. But that fire and free spirit, in me, was bursting to come out.