Warning: spoilers for Love Is Blind season 8, episodes 1—6, ahead.
Love Is Blind viewers may have already crowned Dave Bettenburg as this season’s obligatory villain for his variety of questionable statements and antics, but there’s something else affecting the relationships in the pods.
But let’s use Dave as a jumping off point. Throughout the first five episodes, the medical sales rep struggled to choose between Molly Rose Mullaney, a 30-year-old former cheerleader, and Lauren O’Brien, a 31-year-old former teacher. Though he told Molly she was his “number one” during their second to last date (even asking her about her engagement ring preferences), he just couldn’t let go of his connection with Lauren, especially when she threatened to leave.
Once Lauren said, “I don’t need to be here right now,” it was over for Molly.
Why? More often than not, Love Is Blind contestants with multiple suitors choose the person who shows less devotion. While this pattern has always been detectible, it was impossible to miss in season eight, where it factored into not just Dave’s journey, but multiple love triangles in the pods.
And experts say this pattern is not uncommon, on television or in real life.
“We always value what we have to work for,” Dr. Wendy Walsh, Ph.D. in clinical psychology and professor at California State University Channel Islands, tells Glamour. “Regardless of gender, we have this idea that if we sacrifice for somebody, or somebody doesn’t like us quite enough, that they must be more valuable.”
It didn’t matter that Dave had just told Molly her lack of ultimatums made him like her “more.” Once Lauren admitted she was willing to go home, it seemed he was going to do whatever it took to make her stay.
